December 2011
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sometimes you're not gonna get what you want or...
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omfg
i shaved my armpits today and they are itching so bad right now. its so fucking annoying.
oh yeah, its really cold in this apartment. im excited because i was changing out of my work clothes and i couldnt find a t-shirt to wear because i didnt want to turn the lights on and wake up my boyfriend and so i looked through my boyfriends shirts thinking i wouldnt be able to find anything that would fit...
November 2011
“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.”
– Thich Nhat Hanh
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well, all day long ive been thinking about coming home and spilling my heart out on here, but now that im finally home after an 11 hour work day, i am just too fucking exhausted to do a god damned thing.
sleep is calling me. i have to do this all over again tomorrow.
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My Lola
Just realized not only do I work in the morning tomorrow, but also a night shift at my second job too. Shit. If I would have known I would have made as better effort to get to bed sooner than now. Now all the wrong things have been said and I’ve got hurt feelings again that will surely carry over when I open my eyes tomorrow. You wont cuddle with me, so Lola is taking your place. She won’t let me...
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There’s a monster under this bed. Its clawing at me from the edges but I’m so deep in my despair, so tired of my weaknesses I hardly notice the claw marks it managed to leave on my heart. I barely noticed I was bleeding to death, and in the morning it will be too late.
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Fuck
I am so sick of crying myself to sleep and feeling empty and feeling like nothing I say or feel matters to you. I just want to matter to you but it looks like I can’t do that either.
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Desire demon is after me
So I am laying in my bed right now with nothing but my blue Christmas lights illuminating my room. I thought I was tired but my eyes refuse to close. They don’t give two fucks if I have to work in the morning. I wish I didn’t have to work in the morning but alittle extra money won’t hurt. I’m contemplating dying my hair. I want to because I’m bored and what girl doesn’t love dying their hair? But...
“When I listen to love, I am listening to my true nature. When I express love, I...”
– Julia Cameron
“Psychedelic experience are only a glimpse of genuine mystical insight, but a...”
– Alan Watts (via spacedwaste)
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dude
anybody want some pie? I’ve got three different kinds leftover in my fridge from thanksgiving. lmao!
anartistoflove asked: I would love to not be strangers with you, you seem completely delightful and amazing. Lets be friends? I would love to talk and get to know you more, truly. My name is dosia, I am a channel or medium for god to flow through. Working on becoming purely positive. I will not stop until I reach my goal - of being purely Love. I am also a star child, rainbow child, love being, of this world but also...
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i am the queen of this
dont you hate it when youre hungry so you get something to eat but when you open the silverware drawer you realize there are no clean utensils because you havent washed the fucking dishes in far too long so you are forced to dig around in a sink full of dirty dishwater and when you find one you think “this is ridiculous i really need to wash the fucking dishes” but only for like two...
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to: ALL of you beautiful souls
Im sitting here right now and looking back on my day.
I slept in because I was off of work for once which was nice and my dog Lola cuddled with me in my bed. I needed it. I needed to be cuddled. She is wonderful and makes me feel needed and wanted and loved. Which is more than i can say for anybody else who is supposed to be considered “close” to me right now.
I spent some time with...
“Look at the trees, look at the birds, look at the clouds, look at the stars… and...”
– Osho
“So, the whole idea, you see, is that everything’s falling apart, so don’t try...”
– Alan Watts
“Death cannot be the enemy, because it is part of existence. Existence has given birth to you. Existence is mothering you. And when you die, you simply go back to your original source, to rest and to be born again. There is no need to be afraid. YOU will not die, you will only disappear like a snowflake in the pure air. Your form will disappear into formlessness, the river will disappear...
“No religion has been courageous enough to say, “We know this much, but there is...”
– Osho, The Book of Understanding
